A Christmas Mood

I haven't been on here much lately, I seem to go through phases, but I thought I would upload some Christmas-y pictures of what my evening has consisted of lately. I love this time of year, even the air feels magical. So, I will be soaking up as much of the atmosphere as possible. 

Much time has been spent staring at Word docs on my computer...this was me trying to get
ahead on a French presentation. Spencer is a wonderful work buddy curled at my feet. 

My colourful Christmas lights have been a constant late-night & early-morning companion. 

The twinkling makes my smile every time I see them out of the corner of my eye.

My two holiday teas are now on heavy rotation:
Celestial Seasonings' Nutcracker Sweet & Stash's Christmas Eve. 

I am taking a night off from homework and trying to decide what to curl up with...

Whichever the book, I have a hot cup of "Christmas Eve" tea to sip on. 

And I am snacking on some dark chocolate I bought today
 whilst Christmas shopping, my one indulgence! 

Well, I suppose it's time for me to curl up with one of the books (I am leaning towards Mrs. Browning Book of Poetry), but I might end up reading snippets of them all.

Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night. <3 i="i">

The end of an amazing thing.

Sometimes, there is honestly nothing better than finishing a thousand word essay in one morning. I have been procrastinating writing this essay for Political Science for about three weeks now, even though I knew from the get-go it would be an extremely easy essay, but part of me just kept putting it off...and off...and off. Alas, it is finally done and every student knows that moment where the laptop and books are closed and you just sit there for a moment. Revelling in the completed-ness. Even though there is another project or essay to finish, those few moments of satisfaction are pure bliss.

That's pretty much been my last few weeks: school, swim, eat and sleep in between. Being captain this year was one of my greatest accomplishments, but it sure made me busy. Now that I have finished provincials, I am going to miss the frantic rush around the pool and going to Mark's room every morning before class. We didn't get to compete in out very last relay because one of our girls went home...but I took over thirty seconds off my 400 front crawl. It's still unbelievable. The timers told me my time and I just froze, I had given my everything, there wasn't anything left. I had done everything I could out in the water and I had no regrets. It helped me beat my time; no, it helped me slaughter my time. I am more excited than ever to have these moments commemorated in the form of a tattoo. I haven't been writing anything outside of school lately, but hopefully that will change.

What Is Irking Me at the Moment...

Recently, I just haven't made the time to write anything besides school work, and while Annabelle curls in the corner neglected, I decided I would break my accidental sabbatical by a rant. Yes, very deep, I know. Whilst I was in French class today, I realized one things that really angers me. To put it in layman's terms, I cannot stand when someone will take an insignificant situation, and use depressed to describe the emotions concerning said event.

E.g.--Say you are really tired and you forget to do your homework, saying "This is so depressing" you are incorrectly using the word depress in my mind.

There are individuals out there who struggle daily to find the urge and willpower to get out of bed--they are depressed. By referring to some, seemingly, infinitesimal event as depressing, you are lowering the seriousness of their situation, and making them feel insignificant.

Is there a pause button?

University is looming. I am in the process of applying to the OUAC and last night a representative from Carleton called. Everything is coming up so soon and now more than ever I am unsure if Journalism is the direction I want to head. Talking to the girl last night she mentioned how different the writing is from English; it is very straight-forward and direct. I don't know if that is something I can do... I am depending on my Co-Op next semester to show me what to do. But it makes me nervous to apply NOW for a program I might not want to be in.

I also had my Grad pictures taken today and as the photographer placed the cap upon my head I began trembling. The tears just came and I had to fight them back, astonished at myself. Afterwards, I went into Ms. Haughan's classroom and when I showed her my pictures, she began to cry. I couldn't help myself then. I stayed after school to talk to her too, and missed my bus, but she was kind enough to drive me home.

I am just overwhelmed by the applications and fees and other costs that are piling up at a break-neck speed.

Thankful.

I have neglected writing on her for what seems like forever... In defense, a lot had been going on. Herb came home on Saturday (and everything is going fine!) and before that I spent the week going to school then heading straight to the hospital. So, all in all, it was quite busy, and will be busy for the next few weeks. This Thanksgiving, I am extremely thankful for the good health of my parents. Hopefully, there will be no more visits to the hospital in regards to my mum and dad.

School by Default

I've recently really wanted to post here but I feel as if I am going to talk about either Herb's health problems or complain like a whiny girl about how I miss my ex-boyfriend. One is too close to my heart to feel comfortable sharing as the wound is still fresh and raw, while the second one is pitiful. 

So I suppose I will fall back onto the subject of school. I really am liking my classes this year and am over-the-moon that I finally have a year where I like/love all of my classes. Spanish is new and exciting, Political Science is knowledgeable, and I love the videos of inspirational material I get to watch in Writing class. 

It was during Writing class that I stumbled upon a spoken word poet by the name of Taylor Mali...my word was I amazed by this fellow. I had to come home and watch more videos of his work. Then, tonight, I stumbled across a new poet by the name of Tyler Knott Gregson who I appear to love as well. I have only read a few little excerpts but so far, I love it. 

Senior year and the end of summer

Today was my last first day of high school, ever. I started senior year and after two months of worrying and two wrong schedules, everything is finally in order. This morning my teacher didn't hand me my schedule right away and I thought he was just joking when he started making inquisitive faces and muttering, "what?" because he knew how stressed out I was. It turned out he was not joking and that I had only been assigned one period instead of five for my first semester... But he called the office for me and I met with our lovely vice-principal who was very sweet and patient with me while we worked it out. A lot of my courses are level one and also in the same time slot so that initially posed a large problem. However, the option of online courses and independent studies were available to me and now I can take the courses I need for university!

This year will definitely be an emotional one for, during out welcome assembly I believe they mentioned seniors, last year, and graduating about fifty times. I will admit I was tearing up...

The summer feels as if it passed so quickly, yet exam week feels months ago. I am so excited for my courses, as well as very nervous, but I think I am taking it all in stride. I spent the last month of summer up at the Rock with my Gram which was an amazing opportunity. The town was small, the people not always nice,  but the time spent with my grandmother was all worth it. I didn't do much except read and write, which wasn't exactly a bad thing. I thought moving up there would help distract my mind from the things that have been going on, but unfortunately that was not the case. It actually gave me even more time to think which was very counter-productive. It's was pretty difficult seeing him in school today, and I stumbled across some of our old messages but I'm optimistic that it will get better.